Vomiting Over a Guy in a Bar in Roppongi? Big fucking deal!" I hear your anguished cries resonate. Yeah, big fucking deal. But, what you guys dont know is that I'm back here in the beautiful Snowy Mountains of Australia. The Place where it all began. The winter wonderland where my Nokia 3210 with the silver cover took a call from the raspy-voices Masako Kuroda. And Angel of AEON. The Angel of Death!
WTF is with the "nande daroo dance", as if japanese people were bad enough dancers.
WTF is with old ladys clamoring on to their bags when they see you comming from behind (As opposed to the young ladies who clamor on to the bed)
WTF is with japanese locker rooms. Do they really have comb their hair naked? Not that I'm looking, but even my shlong is longer than my pubes! And at the onsen its worse, they look at you, and let me tell you boys, I AM GIVING YOU A BAAAAD REP!
Dude, if I were you, I would have come down with a "sudden case of the flu", and take her to the nearest love hotel for a spanking.
What happened with her? Please tell me you made a move...
So here is the answer:
Well, that was within my first months of arriving in Japan many years ago. Believe it or not I was actually semi-concerned about breaking the socialisation policy at that time. What a naive idiot I was.
Now that I am back home, I don't feel as happy as I thought I would. I thought that returning home would free me from the Eikaiwa Blues, but some lingering sadness still hangs about me. What's more, after finding out that Japan is not what it's cracked up to be, I am not completely sure if I want to continue studying Japanese. I've spent about 4 years doing it, so stopping would be a great waste.
Arriving in Japan a second time was nowhere near as good as the first. In the past I had been a fresh-faced traveller, new to the weird smells of airport toilets, the sights of beautiful women wearing Donald Duck skirts and sounds of weird high-pitched super genki songs on Japanese commercials telling me to get some germ killing product I would never need. From the look of the housewife on screen I would need to kill every insect in the universe before getting a good nights sleep but for me now those things just seemed so damn annoying.
I've always had a fascination by Japan and visiting the place but I never thought that I'd actually consider doing it. But, get a guy to work in the same crappy job and live in the same old place for long enough and he begins to think some crazy shit. And have that same guy think about crazy shit for long enough and you never know, he may actually do it. Just take a look at Michael Jackson's face and you get the picture.
#10:You like to live in a shoebox & sleep on the floor. #09:Spending 10.00 US for a hamburger & fries seems reasonable to you. #08:Standing in line for an hour and getting on a train to be squeezed like a sardine sounds like fun. #07:Sumo;gotta love those fat boys.Anyone hungry? #06:Where else can you eat raw fish & not look strange? #05:J girls.Need I say more? #04:You enjoy living in a country where you cannot understand anyone.Hey at least you don't have to talk to anyone.